Bridal showers are all about having a good time and sharing a few laughs with friends, so we have put together a list of all the best funny bridal shower messages for you to share. And if you’re looking for short funny bridal shower quotes, we also have you covered.
Now go ahead and browse through to find your favorite.
Funny Bridal Shower Messages and Quotes
You’re young, hot, and smart. After you’re married the clock starts ticking on everything.
We hope you make each other laugh because you’re both gonna need those skills to keep the fire going.
Marriage is spring, the honeymoon is summer, staying together through trouble is fall, winter is the final test. If you mess up, rinse and repeat.
You’re marrying our best friend. There’s a movie about how I really feel about that.
If you think marriage is the right move, then we’re here to cheer you on into battle!
“Marriage is like vitamins: we supplement each other’s minimum daily requirements.” – Kathy Mohnke
Brides without the ‘zilla are much nicer to be around.
“Love is an ocean of emotions entirely surrounded by expenses.” – Thomas Dewar
“I love being married. It’s so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.” – Rita Rudner
Marriage is like a walk in the park… Jurassic Park.
When you get married you give up your purity. We couldn’t stop laughing either! Congrats.
Showered with love (and gifts).
Are you marrying for money or love? We have a bet going and I want to win the pool. Do me a solid, say money.
When we know better we do better. It looks like you finally figured that little quote out.
“Marriage has no guarantees. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery.” – Erma Bombeck
Why are you getting married? Ignore us—we’re totally jealous of all the gifts you’re going to get.
Let’s go two out of three to see who gets him.
Love is brewing — bridal shower edition.
Here’s to love, laughter, and never having to pick a restaurant alone again!
As a gift, I want to give you my love, best wishes, hope-filled prayers, and good thoughts. I’m tapped out so I’m going sentimental.
“You can’t put a price tag on love, but you can on all its accessories.” – Melanie Clark Pullen
We are gathered here today to unite this Bride with her friends so she can have one last hurrah before she bites the big one.
Row, row, row your boat gently down the stream, marriage, marriage, marriage, marriage, will sometimes make you scream.
We love you tons. You are our best friend and we’re behind you all the way through this wedding. We’ll be there for you even if you back out.
Give it time, you’ll want out.
Totally happy for and kinda jealous of you right now.
Marriage is when comedy and tragedy intersect.
“True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked.” – Erich Segal
Stay in shape in case this one doesn’t work out.
“Love is blind but marriage is a real eye-opener.” – Pauline Thomason
Sometimes the road takes you home and other times the road takes you to his home. His is nicer, congrats!
“A man in love is not complete until he is married. Then he is finished.” – Zsa Zsa Gabor
Brides are bright, cheerful, spectacular, envied, and incredible hosts. Then there’s you.
He loves you with all his heart, and we’re still trying to figure out why.
Marriage: when dating goes pro. Congratulations!
Ring it on!
If you want everything to work between you and hubby and you want it bad enough, you still won’t get it! Crap is gonna happen.
You’ve won the best man, just remember on your wedding day to marry the right best man.
Future Mrs. loading… 100%.
“Love is sharing your popcorn.” – Charles M. Schulz
Train him from the start! Actually, forget that. You’re the one who needs training.
Congrats on your upcoming wedding and (hopefully) getting the matching towel set of your dreams!
The reason you’re getting married has been spreading like wildfire, that’s ’cause we’re making it up behind your back! We’re helping you here, we’re trying to put a scar on your perfect, angelic reputation. Nobody is that clean. You don’t need a bridal shower, you need bridal mud wrestling.
Pop the champagne, she’s changing her last name.
Getting married was an excellent idea. I hope you get a big haul.
Marriage: when dating goes pro. Congratulations!
I know this isn’t a baby shower—I was talking about your husband-to-be that you get to take care of!
Family is everything, so don’t forget us!
Congrats, you nabbed yourself the hottest dude in town. You obviously have skills none of us were aware of.
“The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.” – Henry Youngman
Crying about your problems won’t fix them, marrying your problems is akin to setting your hair on fire! Are you sure about this?
Is he the apple of your eye or is he the boot up your ass?
Stay strong, it’s downhill from here on in.
Missing your marriage would be like missing the event of the year because no one can believe you finally said yes!
Take a honeymoon because life is gonna get so busy you’ll be lucky if you have time to breathe.
You are creating another line to your family’s ancestry, is that wise?
“Love conquers all things except poverty and toothache.” – Mae West
“Love is what makes the ride worthwhile.” – Franklin P. Jones
Getting married is like baking a cake. Right now you’re at the stage where you reach in the cupboard and get the bowl. It’s gonna take a lifetime for that sucker to cook.
“All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt.” – Charles M. Schulz
From Miss to Mrs. — upgraded and fully charged.
Pretty soon you’re getting another ring, yippee!
You two look so happy together! It has me worried. That’s not natural.
Time heals all wounds, but once you get married, all bets are off!
You must be a unicorn because your man is magical. That’s the only way to nab a unicorn.
Your bridal shower is going to be the time of my life, mainly because that’s the closest I’ll get to marriage and the best part, gifts!
“Love is being stupid together.” – Paul Valery
Last fling before the ring!
I’m just here for the snacks… and the bride-to-be.
Congratulations on finding the one person you want to annoy for the rest of your life!
Sometimes it’s the Groom who garners all the attention, never mind, that cracked me up too.
Congrats on finding someone who’s just as weird as you are!
We’re celebrating your soon-to-be new title of ‘Mrs.’ And, actually, we’re calling this a going away party.
She said yes… to the dress and the stress.
They call it a Bridal Shower ’cause it’s supposed to be clean. We’ve decided a little filth is necessary for this one.
“Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.” – Albert Einstein
You’re the kind of woman any man would want, unfortunately, you already picked one!
“If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question?” – Lily Tomlin
You are being showered before you become a bride, that’s cause most brides-to-be need cleaning.
She found her main squeeze — now let’s pop the bubbly.
“Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow Internet service to see who they really are.” – Will Ferrell
Your wedding night is supposed to be a tender magical time. Forget that. You’re going to be so exhausted after the wedding that you’ll be lucky to stay awake long enough to remember you’re now a wife. Plus if you don’t consummate the marriage it gives you one more night to annul it if you want!
I’m so jealous you’re marrying him! I’m fuming mad! How come you get everything you want, and I get nothing! Why? Just tell me why? Never mind I know it’s because you’re hard to resist. I can’t even resist you.
“Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards.” – Benjamin Franklin
Get ready for the ride of your life, marriage is like a roller coaster, it’s filled with ups, downs, dips, valleys, and sometimes you get a break and it’s calm for a second.
Don’t worry, when you’re married, not every day will be good, but forget about all that, cause your wedding memories will last you a lifetime!
You’ve gone the distance, you’re almost at the finish line. Actually it’s the new start line. Your beginning is the end of our childhood. Give that some thought!
“Love is a lot like a backache, it doesn’t show up on X-rays, but you know it’s there.” – George Burns
Bride mode: activated.
Tweet out your hopes and dreams, ’cause Twitter needs some good news fast.
This is the most important tip I can ever give you in regards to marriage; when it gets rough, go physical with long walks, swimming, biking, running, jumping jacks, tennis, and sit-ups. Just keep moving . . . away from the bedroom.
May your wedding day be perfect, and may your in-laws always live at least two states away!
Congratulations on getting tagged, pretty soon you’ll be out.
Can you give us some tips on how to get us a guy just like you did? Or you could just raffle yours off to one of us? No? Ok, just spitballing.
The gifts you get today are meant to make up for those nightmare days of marriage! Just kidding, we know you’re the boss and the nightmares will only be his.
“Love is like an hourglass, with the heart filling up as the brain empties.” – Jules Renard
Here’s to love, laughter, and never having to pick a restaurant alone again!
So that is it for our list of Funny Bridal Shower Card Messages and Quotes. We hope you found the perfect one for you!
If you like these, you might also want to check out our other lists of Short Wedding Messages, Bachelorette Party Captions and Engagement Announcement Captions.
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About the Author
Laynni Locke
I am Laynni Locke, a Canadian writer, reader and traveller with a passion for sharing life’s moments on social media. Keeping friends and family in the loop of our lives though photos and videos has become an essential activity for most.
And it doesn’t matter if you are travelling, celebrating a special occasion or just appreciating day-to-day life, when you take that perfect photo you are going to need the perfect caption or quote before you share it. Which is why we started Routinely Shares, providing comprehensive lists of quotes and captions to cover every occasion, adventure or loved one.
With extensive experience as a travel writer, social media specialist and grant writer, I have made it my mission to curate the best and easiest to use lists for your next post.