If you’re looking for a quick and hilarious good morning quote to share, we have put together a list of all the best short funny good morning quotes for your next post. And if you’re looking for short funny good morning sayings for Instagram, we also have you covered.
Now go ahead and browse through to find your favorite.
Short Funny Good Morning Quotes
“You feel a little older in the morning. By noon I feel about 55.” — Bob Dole
“Monday is for people with a mission.” ― Christina Imre
“Tuesday morning and its all uphill from here.” — Mark Yemen
“I’m living a dream I never want to wake up from.” — Cristiano Ronaldo
“In the morning, I woke like a sloth in the fog.” — Leslie Connor
“The sun rises before I do, but I break even by retiring after it does.” — Jules Rena
“I always wake up early Saturday morning, and I have a little bit more time.” — Ehud Olmert
“A good day is a good day. A bad day is a good story.” — Glennon Melton
“Everyone should experience a sunrise at least once a day.” — Phil Dunphy
“Good morning is a contradiction of terms.” — Jim Davis
“The best weeks start on Monday.” ― Nice Peter
“It’s Friday morning mankind! Good vibe, don’t frown and let the monster see you smile!” — Napz Cherub Pellazo
“The only good Monday is a Monday in bed.” ― Lee Horton
“Today’s goals: Coffee and kindness. Maybe two coffees and then kindness.” — Nanea Hoffman
“Morning comes whether you set the alarm or not.” — Ursula Le Guin
“Never face facts; if you do you’ll never get up in the morning.” — Marlo Thomas
“Even bad coffee is better than no coffee at all.” — David Lynch
“I wake up every morning at nine and grab for the morning paper. Then I look at the obituary page. If my name is not on it, I get up.” — Benjamin Franklin
“Morning is wonderful. Its only drawback is that it comes as such an inconvenient time of day.” — Glen Cook
“Progress isn’t made by early risers. It’s made by lazy men trying to find easier ways to do something.” — Robert Heinlein
“For a girl with such a dark mind, you’re a little too in love with the sunrise.” ― Sherry Namdeo
“There should be a rule against people trying to be funny before the sun comes up.” — Kristen Chandler
“Good morning Sunday, wish it was Saturday.” ― Bev Johnston
“I want to live my life in such a way that when I get out of bed in the morning, the devil says, “aw s***, he’s up!” — Steve Maraboli
“A lot of good days… makes a great life! Each day is important.” — Manoj Arora
“The average, healthy, well-adjusted adult gets up at seven-thirty in the morning feeling just plain terrible.” — Jean Kerr
“If you even dream of beating me you’d better wake up and apologize.” — Muhammad Ali
“When you’re wide awake, say it for goodness sake, it’s gonna be a great day.” — Paul McCartney
“I would rather wake up in the middle of nowhere than in any city on earth.” — Steve McQueen
“When reality and dreams collide, typically it’s just your alarm clock going off.” — Crystal Woods
“I hate when I dream of alarm clocks going off.” — Jarod Kintz
“So far as I know, anything worth hearing is not usually uttered at seven o’clock in the morning.” — Moss Hart
“Mornings are almost clean slates. I say almost because the residue of yesterdays is sometimes stuck on them.” — Medeia Sharif
“Every Monday you wake up is a day to make a change.” ― Irvine Welsh
“Sometimes I wake up and think I should start wearing a beret, but I don’t do it.” — Mitch Hedburg
“A morning coffee is my favorite way of starting the day, settling the nerves so that they don’t later fray.” — Marcia Carrington
“I like coffee because it gives me the illusion that I might be awake.” — Lewis Black
“Monday isn’t that bad to be honest, What makes it bad is living in it.” ― Day
“I’m easy like Sunday morning.” — Commodores
“There is no sunrise so beautiful that it is worth waking me up to see it.” — Mindy Kaling
“Morning will come, it has no choice.” — Marty Rubin
“Morning is wonderful. Its only drawback is that it comes at such an inconvenient time of day.” — Glen Cook
“It sounds plausible enough tonight, but wait until tomorrow. Wait for the common sense of the morning.” — H.G. Wells
“Everyone wants me to be a morning person. I could be one, only if morning began after noon.” — Tony Smite
“Keep the dream alive: Hit the snooze button.” — Punit Ghadge
“Some people wake up drowsy. Some people wake up energized. I wake up dead.” — James Marsden
“Morning not only forgives, it forgets.” — Marty Rubin
“The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue.” — Dorothy Parker
“What do sharks do on Monday mornings? They get up and start biting. That’s me.” ― Gemma Collins
“I hate mornings, they start so early.” — Janet Evanovich
“Mornings are pure evil from the pits of hell, which is why I don’t do them anymore.” — Rachel Caine
“Birds scream at the top of their lungs in horrified hellish rage every morning at daybreak.” — Kurt Cobain
“One small positive thought on this Thursday morning can change your whole day.” — Tahnni Dupre
“Every day is a good day to be alive, whether the sun’s shining or not.” — Marty Robbins
“Sunrise is starting to feel like a guilt trip.” ― Kris Kidd
“We don’t “have” a great day, we “make it” a great day!” — Frosty Westering
“I love the early hours of the day. It’s a nice place to visit but I wouldn’t want to live there.” — James Lileks
“Not all the creatures will be excited by the sunrise.” ― Kamaran Ihsan Salih
“Every day is a good day. There is something to learn, care and celebrate.” — Amit Ray
“Lose an hour in the morning and you will spend all day looking for it.” — Richard Whately
If you like these, you might also want to check out our other lists of Positive Morning Quotes, Good Morning Messages for Friends, Funny Summer Letter Board Quotes, Good Morning Sayings, Short Funny Sayings, Romantic Morning Messages and Motivational Wake Up Quotes.
Short Funny Good Morning Sayings
Good morning, my laugh factory! May your day be as amusing as you make mine.
I hope your morning coffee is as strong as your enthusiasm for work!
Good morning! Remember, a yawn is a silent scream for coffee.
Hey, don’t forget to smile and be grateful for having me as your incredible . Good morning!
Wake up, sunshine! It’s a brand new day full of possibilities and pranks!
Good morning, my funny man! I hope your day is as amusing as you are.
They say laughter is the best medicine. So, here’s your daily dose. Good morning sunshine!
Wakey, wakey, my sunshine! It’s time to rise and shine with your contagious laughter.
May your morning be so bright that you need sunglasses just to pour your cereal.
I drink coffee for your protection.
Good morning, my friend! May your day be filled with funny conversations and amusing adventures.
I need to get up; my coffee needs me.
Good morning! May the office be filled with laughter and the coffee be bottomless!
Coffee has given me unrealistic expectations of productivity.
Hope your morning is as bright and beautiful as your smile after your first cup of coffee.
I hope you step on a Lego today, just to remind you that pain is temporary.
5 minutes of extra sleep in the morning seriously does matter…
A yawn is a silent scream for coffee…
Good morning! May your coffee be strong and your Monday be short!
Good morning! Don’t forget to bring your sense of humor to the office today!
You have a message: Wake up, you loafer! Good Morning!
Good morning! Just a reminder that I’m always one step ahead of you in the game of sibling rivalry.
Good morning! Wishing you a day full of sunny smiles and happy thoughts.
Hey, sleepyheads! It’s time to wake up and seize the day with a dose of laughter!
Good morning, sunshine! Time to wake up and annoy our parents together.
Good morning, sleepyhead! I hope you have a day as fabulous as me.
Me & Morning don’t see eye to eye, mostly because I don’t want to open mine!
May your morning be filled with giggles and silly moments. Have a great day!
I don’t like morning people…or mornings…or people.
Getting up early is the first step in the wrong direction! Good Morning!
Good morning! May your day be as fabulous as you pretending to work hard.
Roses are red, violets are blue, wake up lazyhead, I’m waiting for you! Good morning, sleepy.
Good morning! Remember, coffee is just a brewed reminder that you can conquer anything.
Drink some coffee and pretend you know what you’re doing.
God created the sleep, and the devil created an alarm clock.
Smile, it’s a brand-new day! Sending you all the humor and love. Good morning!
I smiled right after getting up. I think I dislocated my face. Good Morning!
Workout in the morning before your brain figures out what you’re doing.
Rise and shine, my funny friend! May your morning be filled with laughter that brightens your day.
May your morning coffee be stronger than your toddler’s will to defy you.
I was beautiful, rich, sexy … and then the alarm rang! Good Morning!
My bed and I love each other but the alarm clock is not clear! Good Morning!
I need something more than coffee but less than cocaine.
Wake up, sleepyhead! Let’s start the day with a big smile and a belly full of laughter.
Good morning to the person who always makes me laugh. You’re my daily dose of happiness!
Good morning world! Your little ray of sarcastic sunshine has arrived.
Good Morning! Come on, get up! The day does not mess up by itself.
Rise and shine! The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
The best part of waking up is still a mystery to me.
Rise and shine, my dear family! Let’s kick off the day with a belly full of laughs.
Hey! Sending you giggles and chuckles to make your morning extra special
I think I’m allergic to morning.
Good morning! May your day be filled with less stress and more coffee.
Wakey-wakey! The world is ready for our awesomeness. Let’s conquer the day together.
Of course I can start the day motivated. Just not in the morning! Good Morning!
Good morning, sleepyhead! I hope today’s coffee helps you tolerate my morning craziness.
Good morning! May your day be full of random awkward encounters and high five-able moments.
Just because I’m awake doesn’t mean I am functioning at full capacity.
Rise and shine, superstar! It’s time to conquer the world and make everyone laugh!
Good morning! Remember, you’re not allowed to be grumpy until I annoy you.
Good morning, my funny bone! Get ready to crack me up throughout the day.
He who gets up early … is sleepy all day! Good Morning!
Hey you with all that energy of 6 a.m….You’re not human.
Wishing you a morning filled with endless laughter and minimal meetings!
Why do they call it ‘beauty sleep’ when you wake up looking like a troll.
The coffee was added successfully. This body can now be started. Good Morning!
Wishing you a morning full of laughter and joy, my dearest hubby!
Hope your morning is less Monday and more Friday! Let’s make work fun!
Wakey-wakey, it’s time to raise the humor level in our household. Good morning!
Rise and shine, sleepyhead! Time to seize the day and conquer the world!
Good Morning! At the beginning of a new stressful day.
Good morning, my friend! May your day be filled with funny moments and unexpected jokes.
I hope your day starts with a smile and ends with laughter. Good morning sunshine!
Tomorrow will come, you have no choice. Good Morning!
Wishing you a morning full of laughter and a day full of comedy. Good morning, my witty friend!
May the force be with you this morning, but first, coffee!
Good morning, my friend! May your day be filled with silly jokes and laughter that warms your heart.
Help…I’ve ran out of weekend!
I’m only a morning person on December 25th.
Good morning, my friend! May your day be as funny as a stand-up comedy show.
Rise and shine! May your day be filled with jokes and giggles.
Rise and shine! Don’t forget to brush your teeth, you stinky breath.
Be strong’ I whisper to my coffee.
All the coffee beans in Colombia won’t make me a morning person.
Hope your morning is full of unanswered texts, misplaced car keys, and an empty coffee cup.
I wake up with a good attitude every day. Then idiots happen
A person falls asleep the fastest when he turns off the alarm clock.
Good morning, sunshine! Your sense of humor brightens up my day. Keep spreading the laughter!
Roses are red, violets are blue, I’m grateful for a someone as funny as you. Good morning!
Getting up early is the first step in the wrong direction.
Start your day with a hearty laugh! Good morning, family!
Wishing you a cup of happiness, a spoonful of laughter, and a slice of laziness for breakfast today.
I hope you step on a Lego every morning. Good morning!
Hey, hope this morning brings you joy, laughter, and a little less weirdness. But just a little.
Good morning! May your day be as positive as your WiFi signal.
Good morning! May your cup be filled with coffee and your tolerance for stupid people be high.
I hope these funny messages bring a smile to your face. Good morning, sleepyheads!
I was gonna take over the world this morning but I overslept. Postponed.
Wake up and smell the coffee, sunshine. Good morning and have a fantastic day!
I like my bed more than I like most people.
Wishing you a morning as bright as your face when you see food. Good morning!
I could be a morning person if morning happen to be around noon.
Good morning! May your day be as amusing and entertaining as our banter.
Wake up and smell the jokes, my funny friend! Sending you a morning full of laughter and hilarity.
Wishing you a morning full of laughter and productivity! Let’s make this day amazing!
Good morning, sunshine! Time to wake up and join the laughter parade!
My mom said follow your dreams, so I went back to bed.
So that is it for our list of Short Funny Good Morning Quotes and Sayings. We hope you found the perfect one!
About the Author
Laynni Locke
I am Laynni Locke, a Canadian writer, reader and traveller with a passion for sharing life’s moments on social media. Keeping friends and family in the loop of our lives though photos and videos has become an essential activity for most.
And it doesn’t matter if you are travelling, celebrating a special occasion or just appreciating day-to-day life, when you take that perfect photo you are going to need the perfect caption or quote before you share it. Which is why we started Routinely Shares, providing comprehensive lists of quotes and captions to cover every occasion, adventure or loved one.
With extensive experience as a travel writer, social media specialist and grant writer, I have made it my mission to curate the best and easiest to use lists for your next post.