Funny Halloween Puns and Jokes for Spooky Season Laughs

Halloween is a fun holiday and perfectly suited for jokes and puns, which is why we have put together a list of all the best funny Halloween puns for you to share. And if you’re looking for short Halloween jokes, we also have you covered.

Now go ahead and browse through to find your favorite.

Funny Halloween Puns

Why did the ghoul couple break up? One was ghosting the other.

What’s a vampire’s favorite holiday? Fangs-giving.

Been there, done bat.

She’s got a real boo-merang personality—she keeps coming back!

Vampires make the best counselors; they really know how to draw you out.

I feel like I’m living in a nightmare… and it’s Monday morning!

How did one ghost know the other ghost was lying? He could see right through him.

What’s a vampire’s favorite cocktail? Bloody Mary.

What do skeletons like to eat at cookouts? Spare ribs.

Life’s a witch, then you fly.

What’s a ghost’s favorite pastime? Bargain haunting.

 Why don’t mummies get massages? They’re afraid they might unwind.

Which Great Lake should you visit on Halloween? Lake Eerie.

The horror movie had a shocking twist; it was truly fang-tastic.

Let’s give ‘em pumpkin to talk about.

What do weight-conscious vampires drink? Blood light.

Fangs for the memories, horror nights never disappoint.

I witch you all could see how spellbinding this party is!

Get witch or die trying.

Keep calm and horror on!

Frankenstein joined a band — turns out he’s a real monster on the drums.

Have a fa-boo-lous Halloween!

This is my resting witch face.

Deja boo!

How can you prevent being possessed by a demon? Exorcise.

You’ve got another thing pumpkin.

Don’t be a scaredy cat, join the fun!

Where do zombies like to swim? In the dead sea.

How did the ghost learn to play piano? It used sheet music.

Home treat home.

Fang you. Fang you very much.

Where do celebrity ghosts go on vacation? Mali-boo.

Ghoul friends forever Scream Puns Horror Puns

Why aren’t vampires popular? They’re a pain in the neck.

What’s a vampire’s favorite snack? A neck-tarine.

Why was the witch late to work? She over-swept.

It’s a grave new world out there.

The vampire opened a bakery—he specialized in blood orange tarts.

What do you call a werewolf with a fever? A hot dog.

Who did the ghost take to the Halloween party? His ghoul friend.

What happens if a witch parks illegally? Her car gets toad.

What ghost around, comes around.

Ghouls just wanna have fun… and maybe a little scare!

Why don’t witches own cars with automatic transmission? They know how to drive a stick.

Where do ghosts prefer to shop? At the boo-tique.

Hey there, gourd-eous!

It’s the most wonderful time of the fear.

I’m not scared, I’m just horror-ified!

Who brought the boo’s?

Why did the ghost go out for cheerleading? She had a lot of spirit.

Why did the scarecrow win an award? It was outstanding in its field.

Frankly, I think this party is electrifying!

It’s horror-spicious that the lights went out.

Why did the angry witch leave her broomstick at home? She was afraid she’d fly off the handle.

Today’s horror-scope says I’m doomed… but fabulously.

This party’s so good, it’s giving me chills and thrills!

When in doubt, scream it out—horror-gasmic relief.

Things just went from bad to warts.

All is calm, all is fright.

Why did everyone think the witch was grumpy? She had a resting witch face.

Why did the witch go to the doctor? She had a fainting spell.

What kind of muffins do ghosts eat? Boo-berry.

I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t handle the horror-tunities.

I’ve got a ghouled craft project this weekend.

Why did the ghost need first aid? It had a boo-boo.

Our ghost friend is always in high spirits.

The A-Scream.

What do baby ghosts need to sit at a table? Boo-ster seats.

How many real vampires are there? None. Unless you count Dracula.

How do you say “goodbye” to a vampire? “So long, sucker!”

The ghost became an influencer… he had super natural followers.

This haunted library is a book-and-spook paradise.

Boos cruise.

Saturday Fright Live.

Why don’t haunted houses like rain? It dampens their spirits.

Horror-d’oeuvres anyone?Horror doeuvres anyone Scream Puns Horror Puns

The gourd, the bad and the ugly.

Let’s get this party star-dead!

What do zombies eat for dessert? Ladyfingers.

A ghoul’s paradise.

Friday Night Frights.

Horror-mance is in the air tonight!

This haunted corn maze is a nightmare on stalk street.

Vampires hate fast food—it gives them coffin fits.

Spooky season’s here — it’s ghost to be good.

What do ghosts like to read? Boo-ks!

Witches don’t do dishes—they just broom everything under the rug.

Why do witches like to stay in hotels? They offer broom service.

I saw a ghost at the eye doctor—he had super boo-vision.

My playlist is killer — it slays.

Frankly, Frankenstein’s party etiquette is shockingly good!

Broom with a view.

How do ghosts apply makeup? They use vanishing cream.

How can you tell a ghost is drunk? It’s three sheets to the wind.

Eat, drink and be scary.

What did one skeleton say to the other before eating dinner? Bone appetite!

Where my witches at?

The vampire had a bloody good time at the Halloween party.

What’s a mathematicians favorite Halloween treat? Pumpkin pi.

Where do witches go when they get sick? The witch doctor.

Witches be crazy.

Chasin’ the boos away.

What do birds say on Halloween? Trick or tweet.

I signed up for horror yoga; now I’m hex-tra flexible.

The mummy was always wrapped up in his work – he was on a roll!

Bat’s all folks!

Who rules the pumpkin patch? The pump-king.

Every cloud has a silver lining… until it rains zombies.

What did one invisible man say to the other? Long time, no see.

She’s a horror-ific dancer, her moves will scare you.

Even as a ghost, he couldn’t stop working; he’s a real work-a-boolic.

What do ghosts wear when it snows? Boo-ts.

Make way for the Hallo-queen.

The black cat wrote poetry—it was purr-anormal prose.

I went to a spa, but the vibe was more horror than aura.

If you’ve got it, haunt it!

The vampire’s favorite fruit is a neck-tarine.

What’s the zombie’s least favorite candy? Life Savers.

Why don’t mummies have any friends? They’re too wrapped up in their own problems.

Ghoul luck, babe!

If you’ve got it, haunt it.

What is a zombie’s favorite day of the week? Fright-day.

Time to boo-gie!

Werewolves avoid calendars—they hate being boxed in.

Let’s horror-ganize a movie night.

Why did the ghost pick its nose? It had boo-gers in it.

Bone to be wild.

Horror-scope says I’m doomed.

What kind of car does the boogeyman drive? A monster truck.

How do bats know where to fly? They wing it.

Meow you’re talking!

Dead inside, but festive outside.

How do ghosts become pilots? They go to fright school.

This horror-copter ride is spine-chilling!

Orange you pumped for Halloween?

Did you hear about the gloomy jack-o’-lantern? It needed to lighten up.

What sport do bats like to play? Baseball.

What’s a ghost’s least favorite day of the week? Moan-day.

Why did the vampire use mouthwash? It had bat breath.

Where do spiders do their online shopping? On the web.

Gourd vibes only.

What do zombies say after being introduced? Pleased to eat you.

How do monsters predict the future? They check their horror-scope.

You’ve got hex appeal.

The skeleton wanted to go to the party, but he had no body to go with.

The ghost broke up with his ghoul-friend — said she was too clingy.

Why did the cyclops stop teaching? It only had one pupil.

Horror you doing today?

When life gives you horror, make it a thriller!

What’s a skeleton’s favorite instrument? The trom-bone.

Zombies keep their plans alive by writing in their die-aries.

Diamonds are a ghoul’s best friend.

Treat me right.

What’s a witch’s favorite breakfast food? Scream of Wheat.

Haunted mirrors reflect badly on everyone.

Why didn’t the ghost go to prom? It had no body to dance with.

I had a monster of a time trying to find a good Halloween costume.

How do you spell relief? M-A-G-I-C.

That horror novel had an un-boo-lievable twist.

How do ghosts take their coffee? With scream and sugar.

What do monsters serve at a cookout? Frankenfurters and Halloweenies.

Why don’t witches like winter? They hate cold spells.

What do witches use to style their hair? Scare-spray.

I’m just here for the boo’s.

The devil had a devilishly good time raising hell at the haunted house.

Ghost ahead, make my day.

Did you hear the one about the ghost Halloween party? It was a real scream.

What did the werewolf say when he broke his toe? “Ow-oooooh!”

Horror-mones acting up. Time for a full moon meltdown.

Where do baby ghosts go? Day-scare.

Frankenstein was shocked to find out he had a shockingly good singing voice.

Why didn’t the police arrest the zombie? He couldn’t be taken alive.

Bewitcha in a minute.

Why did the zombie eat brains? He wanted some food for thought.

Why’d the witch get kicked out of school? She couldn’t spell.

Undead as a doornail.

What do you call a monster who likes to dance? The boogeyman.

This party is going to be un-boo-lievable.

Cereal killer.

What kind of rocks do ghosts collect? Tombstones.

My broomstick runs on pumpkin spice.

I purr a spell on you.

Ghoul-friends forever!

What kind of dog does a vampire have? Bloodhound.

What do you call a werewolf that pays attention? Aware-wolf.

Bats don’t use GPS—they always wing it.

This appears to be a grave situation.

I’m starting a horror band; we play jazz-boo.

I’ve got a bat feeling about this.

How do you starve a zombie? The answer is a no-brainer.

What do vampires and false teeth have in common? They both come out at night.

Who won the vampire marathon? No one knows — it was neck and neck.

I’m in a long-distance horror-relationship… we scream together every night.

What do you called two witches that share the same apartment? Broom-mates.

How can you tell that a vampire has a cold? It’s coffin.

Why does everyone like skeleton jokes? Because they’re humerus.

Where did the zombie buy a house? On a dead-end street.

How do skeletons make calls? On the tele-bone.

I’m in a horror-fic mood!

Where do ghosts buy their cookies? From the ghoul scouts.

What do you need to unlock a haunted house? A spoo-key.

What do ghosts like to drink when they party? Boo-ze.

Having a skele-ton of fun.

That wasn’t a red flag, it was a full horror siren.

Why do cemeteries have fences? Everyone’s dying to get in.

Why does it take so long to get served at a ghost restaurant? They’ve only got a skeleton crew working.

Just another horror-dinary day of surviving jump scares.

Where my ghouls at?

Why doesn’t Dracula have any friends? Everyone thinks he’s batty.

Too gourd to be true… it’s a horror!

Bat to the bone.

I scream you scream, we all scream for… ice cream… and a good horror flick!

Home of the grave.

On a coffin break.

Witch better have my candy!

How did the jack-o-lantern fix the rip in its jeans? It used a pumpkin patch.

Just another day in the horror-scope.

Bone-jour!

Ghosts hate rain—they just can’t handle the drip.

You don’t know jack-o’-lantern.

What’s a ghost’s favorite game? Hide-and-go-shriek.

How do monsters travel long distances? By scare-plane.

I’m just a ghoul, standing in front of a boo, asking him to love her.

Why should you avoid werewolves? They’re good fur nothing.

Have a fang-tastic Halloween.

Fangs for the memories!

Feeling gourd-geous in this pumpkin patch.

Ghost traumatic stress disorder

Ghosts love elevators—they’re great for lifting spirits.

Someone’s spoiling for a fright.

 Who won the skeleton 5K race? No body.

The haunted house tour was a scream – I couldn’t stop coffin from all the scares.

Squad ghouls.

How do you make a skeleton laugh? Tickle its funny bone.

Why did the skeleton shut off the scary movie? It didn’t have the guts to watch it.

The skeleton opened a gym — it’s all about bone strength.

You’re just my blood type.

I haven’t got a boo.

It’s all or pumpkin.

Show me the mummy!

That horror movie was a scream.

Bone to be wild.

I’m in a horror-ble mood today.

What’s the one store werewolves avoid? The flea market.

The Legend of Creepy Hollow.

Let’s boo this!

Why did the vampire get glasses? It was blind as a bat.

That meeting wasn’t just bad, it was horror-endous.

Did you hear about the werewolves that went out to a comedy club? It was a howl.

Creepin’ it real.

I’m going to start a horror-chestra—let’s make some scream music.

Did you hear about the zombie party? It wasn’t very lively.

Why doesn’t Frankenstein dance? He’s got two left feet.

Every dog has its day, but every ghost has its night!

Where’s Dracula’s ATM? At the blood bank.

That movie was so good, it gave me horror-rible nightmares.

Witch way to the party?

Why did the werewolf eat a bag of coins? He thought the change would do him good.

Why don’t vampires eat cows? They don’t like stakes.

Did you hear the one about the confusing cemetery book? It had too many plots.

Witch better have my candy.

What do you get when you drop a pumpkin? Squash.

Trapped in a twisted horror-mance. Love bites, literally.

Feelin’ wicked.

Don’t like my costume? I couldn’t scare less.

What’s the safest room in the house if you’re attacked by zombies? The living room.

So that is it for our list of Funny Halloween Puns and Jokes. We hope you found the perfect one for you!

If you like these, you might also like our other lists of Short Halloween Captions, October Sayings, November Sayings, Ghost Puns and Funny Halloween Quotes.