It’s that time of year when you want to let the people in your life know you’re thinking of them for the holidays, but you don’t feel like taking it to seriously. So we have put together a list of all the best short funny merry Christmas wishes for you to share. And if you’re looking for short funny Merry Christmas greetings and messages, we also have you covered.
Now go ahead and browse through to find your favorite.
Short Funny Merry Christmas Messages
I love Christmas. I receive a lot of wonderful presents I can’t wait to exchange
Let’s drink and be merry.
Merry Christmas! May your holiday be filled with more presents than awkward family conversations!
May your Christmas be filled with more laughter than a reindeer at a snowball fight!
May your holidays be as lovely as they look on Instagram
I hope you love the present you told me to buy for you. Merry Christmas!
Merry Crimbo. Looking forward to catching up in the New Year, once the chaos is over!
May you always find the end of the tape first time.
Dear Santa…I can explain
On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me … What is this, and did you keep the receipt?
Sweet and twisted. Does that make me a candy cane?
I love you from head to mistletoe
The battle between me and carbs is the real war this Christmas
Hope you have a remember-forever-and-ever-and-ever-and-ever kind of holiday
Hope your Christmas is as cool as you think you are!
Have I been naughty this year? Well, I hope one of the reindeer eats the “naughty” list
I only got you a card in case you got me one…
The Christmas alphabet has noel
Here’s my resting Grinch face
Santa saw your Facebook – you’re getting a dictionary this year!
I’m dreaming of a white Christmas, but if the white runs out, I’ll drink the red
All I want for Christmas is you… and cookies… and hot chocolate
Ho-ho-home for Christmas!
You can get away with being extra cute at Christmas, everything is so twinkly after all.
Merry Christmas! May your holiday be filled with awkward family photos and too much food!
Let’s go to the kitchen and whisk everyone a merry Christmas
“It’s all fun and games until Santa checks the naughty list.” – Anon
“You know you’re getting old when Santa starts looking younger.” – Robert Paul
Leading up to the worst night’s sleep all year
Merry Christmas! Now, excuse us while we head back to the mistletoe
Snowy hair, don’t care. It’s Christmas!
Bah, humbug!
Son of a nutcracker!
Hope your holiday season is as fun as our group chats – minus the autocorrect fails!
Hold on for deer life
Three phrases that sum up Christmas are: Peace on Earth, Goodwill to Men and Batteries Not Included.
“Aren’t we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas. You know, the birth of Santa?” – Matt Groening
I only got you a card in case you got me one…
Today, I will sleigh Christmas!
Do you know why this Christmas card is so wonderful? Because it isn’t an email and it isn’t a text.
But first, let me take an elfie.
Hope you enjoy this “elfie” from us
Christmas comes but once a year, but when it comes, it better bring good beer.
May your holiday season be so joyful, even your in-laws will seem like fun!
You’ll like this present. You gave it to me last year!
“Nothing’s as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas.” – Kin Hubbard
The best gift you can give me is trying to be nice today!
Time for daily chocolate, it really is the most wonderful time of the year!
Yule always be my favourite.
I’ve finally found the true meaning of Xmas, it’s for those people who can’t spell Christmas!
Hope your Christmas is full of joy, laughter, and zero sibling rivalry!
Have a very merry Christmas and remember Christmas calories don’t count…
Christmas Eve is the one night I’m looking forward to morning
I put so much thought into your gift that it’s now too late to get it. Merry Christmas anyway.
Yoda caroling: A Merry Christmas, we wish you. A Merry Christmas, we wish you
May your holiday be full of good times, and may you finally win at family board games this year!
Here’s to a Christmas so merry that even your cat can’t knock the tree over!
May your Christmas be as flawless as your gift-wrapping skills (or at least the effort counts)!
My presence is really the only gift you need. Merry Christmas!
I put the “ho” in “ho, ho, ho!”
May your fun be large and bills be small this year. Merry Christmas!
It’s all fun and games until Santa checks the naughty list.
Wishing you a Christmas so merry, even your Christmas sweater can’t keep up with the cheer!
Let’s rock around the Christmas tree!
Being good for goodness’ sake was not enough motivation
“The perfect Christmas tree? All Christmas trees are perfect!” – Charles N Barnard
Besides the tree, guess who’s going to get lit all day?
Help, I’m scared of elf on the shelf.
I’ll even let you warm your feet on me this winter. Love you.
Happy Christmas! Yule always be my favourite.
I hope your smiles will be as big as your credit card bill this Christmas!
Santa’s got the list, but I’ve got the eggnog. Let’s make this Christmas unforgettable!
Hope your Christmas is as magical as you made our holidays growing up (minus the stress!)
You know it’s Christmas when your wallet is empty but your heart is full
The most beautiful part about Christmas is that it’s the last day of all the stress.
Let’s get very merry!
May your Christmas be like Santa – fat, cheerful and abundant!
Wishing you a Christmas that’s as unforgettable as our best nights out. Only with more sleep!
Believe in your elf
That warm feeling isn’t just the Christmas spirit. I think you left the oven on.
I would say all I want for Christmas is YOU but, I could really do with some money
This one had me at “ho ho ho”!
Time for presents!
“The best way to spread Christmas cheer is singing loud for all to hear.” – Will Ferrell, “Elf”
May your Christmas be filled with as much joy as your in-laws after you win the Christmas board games!
Why is it so difficult to think of what to write in a Christmas card?
“Christmas is a baby shower that went totally overboard.” – Andy Borowitz
Feelin’ frosty
All the jingle ladies, all the jingle ladies
You better not pout
Wishing you a Christmas as fabulous as you are. No pressure!
Sleigh my name, sleigh my name
You’re always on my nice list you wonderful human.
May your regifting practice go undetected this year
Hope you didn’t forget it’s Christmas. It always comes around this time of the year.
Wishing you a Christmas so awesome, even Santa will ask to join our next party!
Worrying about what to do this Christmas season. Just sit down and enjoy the Merry part!
“I love Christmas. I receive a lot of wonderful presents I can’t wait to exchange.” – Henny Youngman
Wishing you a Christmas so awesome that even Santa can’t keep up with your coolness!
You can find us under the mistletoe
No lying… We’ve been more naughty than nice!
It’s the most wine-derful time of the year
Christmas is a good excuse to send cards to all my favourite people.
If kisses were snowflakes, we’d be having a blizzard!
“That’s the true spirit of Christmas; people being helped by people other than me.” – Jerry Seinfeld
May your gifts be many, and your returns and exchanges be few
Ooooooh. We thought you said, “Christmas BEER.”
Mentally: I am totally ready for Christmas. Financially? I’ll never be ready.
Yay! It’s Christmas! Let’s buy loads of stuff no one needs!
Ho, ho, ho? More like ha, ha, ha!
Christmas cheer? I thought I heard Christmas beer.
Christmas is Claus for celebration!
I’ve decided to give everyone my opinion instead of presents this year. Be excited!
Dear Santa…can you please define “nice?”
Getting more lit than the Christmas tree
I would say all I want for Christmas is you, but about that handbag…
Hope your Christmas is as lit as your tree (but with fewer tangled lights)!
The reason why we should always jingle all the way is because nobody likes half-assed jingles
Drink up grinches
Whoever said ‘all is calm’ has never been to our house around Christmas.
Making it count because Christmas only comes once a year
Merry Christmas and a happy new year.
Why are Dasher and Dancer always taking coffee breaks? Because they are Santa’s star-bucks!
You know what I got for Christmas? Fat. I. Got. Fat!
Keep your friends close, your enemies closer, and receipts for all major purchases
Wishing you a Christmas filled with love, laughter, and no DIY disasters this year!
May the Christmas season fill our home with joy, hearts with love, and everything I put on my wish list
May your Christmas be as fat and jolly as Santa after eating too many cookies!
A mistle-toast to the holiday season
Who needs presents when I’ve got you!?
“Let’s be naughty and save Santa the trip.” – Gary Allan
Wishing you a Christmas as fabulous as you are—because anything less wouldn’t do!
“Santa Claus has the right idea – visit people only once a year.” – Victor Borge
“Christmas is a time when you get homesick – even when you’re home.” – Carol Nelson
Dear Santa: This isn’t what it looks like
The best thing about the holidays is getting to catch up on sleep and TV shows. Not to forget the food…
For your present, it’s either a warm hug or a snug choke-hold. Choose wisely!
Santa’s nearly here, hooray!
All my savings just disappeared! Is this what they meant by Christmas wonder?
“Who’s the bane of Santa’s life? The elf and safety officer.” – Catherine Tate
Christmas break to-do list: Eat, drink, nap
You make me feel merrier than any mulled wine, can’t wait to have some festive fun with you!
My spirit animal is Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer
It’s beginning to *cost* a lot like Christmas…
Hope your Christmas is as sweet as the cookies you’ll be burning this year!
Shake it like a pole-oriod picture
Merry Christmas! May your holiday season be as sweet as the cookies you attempt to bake!
December 25th is the only day I become a morning person
What happens under the mistletoe stays under the mistletoe
Wishing you a holiday full of fun, food, and just enough family drama to keep it interesting!
100% on the naughty list
Drink up, Grinches! It’s Christmas
My fat pants are ready
We’re just a bunch of candy canes—sweet and slightly twisted
How do cats greet each other at Christmas? A furry Merry Christmas and happy Mew Year!
Have the best Christmas ever.
It’s time for our ugly sweaters. It’s Christmas time!
I hope you like the present you told me to buy for you.
You had me at ho ho ho
All spruced up and ready the jingle the night away
But wait—there’s myrrh
Your presents is requested
All I want for Christmas is you (and maybe some Christmas cookies, too)
All I want for Christmas is…food!
A Christmas Conspiracy: Olive, the other reindeer…
Can’t wait to deck the halls with you.
Forget the presents. I’m just here for the cookies. Merry Christmas!
Rockin’ each other’s Christmas socks
We go together like hot chocolate and marshmallows
I hope Christmas finds you in good spirits! And by spirits, I do mean alcohol.
I don’t usually write Christmas cards, but when I do, I usually write the same thing in all of them.
You can never get too many lynx sets at Christmas
I wish you seasons eatings! Merry Christmas
So that is it for our list of Short Funny Merry Christmas Wishes, Greetings and Messages. We hope you found the perfect one for you!
If you like these, you might also want to check out our other lists of Short Christmas Letter Board Quotes, Funny Christmas Shopping Quotes and Christmas Stocking Quotes.
About the Author
Laynni Locke
I am Laynni Locke, a Canadian writer, reader and traveller with a passion for sharing life’s moments on social media. Keeping friends and family in the loop of our lives though photos and videos has become an essential activity for most.
And it doesn’t matter if you are travelling, celebrating a special occasion or just appreciating day-to-day life, when you take that perfect photo you are going to need the perfect caption or quote before you share it. Which is why we started Routinely Shares, providing comprehensive lists of quotes and captions to cover every occasion, adventure or loved one.
With extensive experience as a travel writer, social media specialist and grant writer, I have made it my mission to curate the best and easiest to use lists for your next post.