Skip to content

145 Funny Golf Captions to Tee Off To


Golf and a sense of humor go hand in hand. Which makes these funny golf captions for Instagram the best way to go. Chances are you can find one here that makes you laugh. We even included some short funny golf quotes for Instagram for when someone else has said it best first. Find your favorite before hitting the links!

Our Favorite Funny Golf Captions for Instagram

  • Golf, you have to play to understand.
  • The mind messes up more shots than the body.
  • Old golfers never die, they just putter around/away.
  • The worst day of mini golf beats the best day of work.
  • 90% of the golf shot happens before you make a swing.
  • I like to go clubbing… on the golf course.
Golfer at sunset with golf captions funny
  • I usually golf in the mid 70’s… Any colder and I just stay home.
  • Golf is a great way to quickly become disappointed in yourself.
  • Whoever said Practice makes perfect obviously never played golf.
  • I hold several records on the golf course, but they all pertain to beer.
  • Heaven seems a little closer when your house is near the golf course.
  • I hate golf! I Hate Golf!! And I HATE GOLF!!! Oooh! Nice shot! I Love Golf!
  • Golf was not our sport but was an absolutely gorgeous day to give a swing at it.
  • Golf is our favorite course.
Golf cart with funny golf captions
  • If I hit it right, it’s a slice. If I hit it left, it’s a hook. And If I hit it straight, it’s a miracle.
  • Remember that no matter how bad you are playing, it is always possible to play worse.
  • The short game around the green is important but much more important is the approach.
  • Show me a man who is a good loser and I’ll show you a man who is playing golf with his boss.
  • Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today it’s called golf.
  • Old golfers never die, they just keep putting along.
  • A good golf partner is one who is a little bit worse than you are.
  • It takes a lot of balls to golf the way I do.
  • Golf: I’d quit the stupid game if I wasn’t married.
  • Golf is deceptively simple and endlessly complicated.
  • Golf – It’s not just a game / That’s the name of the game!
  • Work is for people who don’t know how to play golf.
  • Keep on hitting it straight until the wee ball goes in the hole.
  • In golf, as in life, it’s the follow-through that makes the difference.
  • Golf has produced a lot of millionaires…most of them are former billionaires.
Golfer with funny golf Instagram captions
  • If you’ve forgotten what frustration is like, spend 10 minutes on a golf course.
  • Success in golf depends less on strength of body than strength of mind and character.
  • I never found golf interesting, but then I learned that’s just where men go to let go of their anger.
  • Never try to shot you haven’t practiced.
  • Serving cute golf skirts 24/7.
  • Eat… Sleep… Golf
  • Let’s go golfing.
  • Golf is a good walk spoiled.
  • Golfing does not get better than this.
  • I like long, romantic rides in the golf cart.
  • Golf tips: This can take 5 strokes off anyone’s game — it’s called an eraser.
  • As you walk down the fairway of life, you must smell the roses, for you only get to play one round.
  • Golf is a game where the ball always lies poorly and the players always lie well.
  • Golf is an all-around sport, if you want to be all-round, you gotta train all-round.
  • Take a break from life, enjoy the fresh air and shout a bunch of expletives at a golf ball.
  • It takes a lot of balls to play golf the way I do.
  • Golf is a game where the ball always lies poorly and the player always lies well.
  • My doctor says to take my iron every day.
  • Golf is the answer no matter the question.
Golfer with funny golf captions for Instagram
  • I started watching golf for the first time yesterday. I’m really worried about myself and I was actually enjoying it.
  • If it involves golf, count me in
  • “I play too much golf.” – said no one ever
  • I live on greens! (bowl of golf balls instead of salad).
  • My golf score seems to improve considerably when I have the score card.
  • My Doctor Says To Live On Greens.
  • Golf is the hardest game in the world to play, and the easiest to cheat at.
  • Never break your putter and your driver in the same round or you’re dead.
  • Curb the self-talk, focus on the now, on next shot and don’t overthink it.
  • In golf as in life, it’s the follow through that counts.
  • It’s a funny thing, the more I practice the luckier I get.
  • That was a good one, is quite literally the height of my enthusiasm for a good swing.
  • Golf is a science, the study of a lifetime, in which you can exhaust yourself but never your subject.
  • Give me life, liberty, and the pursuit of golf balls.
  • A day of golfing keeps the worries away.
Golfers with funny clever golf captions
  • Give me golf clubs, fresh air, and a beautiful partner, and you can keep the clubs and the fresh air.
  • Golf makes me smile sometimes.
  • With a look of pure concentration on that pot.
  • I don’t know how I can play so well and score so bad
  • Forget failures, forget mistakes , forget everything except what you are going to do right now.
  • I only golf on days that end in y.
  • I didn’t miss the putt. I made the putt. The ball missed the hole.
  • Golfers don’t get mad … they get tee’d off!
  • Golf is an easy game… it’s just hard to play.
  • The golfer’s diet: stay on the greens.
Golfer with funny cute golf captions
  • Bye Bye Birdie
  • Happiness is a day at the golf course.
  • You’re the best person to golf with by par.
  • Just in case you needed proof that I’ve got game.
  • You have to work a little, to (golf) ball a lot.
  • I’ve got some game.
  • Working on my swing this weekend. How about you?
  • Playing mini golf and practicing for the big leagues.
  • Having a (golf) ball whenever I’m with you.
  • Gone golfing, be back later.
  • Becoming besties with the sand traps.
  • Pro golf tip: Don’t lose your ball in the water.
  • You’re my favorite person to golf with by par.

If you like these, you might also want to check out our other lists of Funny Golf Quotes, Golf Puns, Funny Summer Quotes, Funny Fishing Quotes and Short Nature Quotes.

Short Funny Captions for Golfers

  • It takes a lot of balls to golf as I do.
  • Proof is in the putting.
  • I play golf because it’s fun.
  • You putt me in a great mood.
  • I like big putts and I cannot lie.
  • Golf is the closest game we call life.
  • Life is always good at the golf course.
  • My body is here but my mind is on golf.
Golfer with short funny captions about golf
  • I’m not over the hill. I’m just on the back nine.
  • Where do ghosts play golf? – On a golf corpse.
  • Half of the golf is fun, the other half is putting.
  • The most important shot on golf is the next one.
  • I’d give up golf if I didn’t have so many sweaters.
  • Life is short. Spend it at the golf course.
  • Fluent in golf.
  • Golf life
  • Hunting for birdies
  • Golf time
  • Future Tiger Woods.
  • Summer golf feeling
  • Life is game, golf is serious.
  • Golf hair don’t care.
  • Sleep. Golf. Repeat.
Golf carts with short funny captions for golf
  • Golfer’s favorite flowers – Fore-get-me-nots.
  • Quit wasting time and puttering around.
  • Living on greens!
  • When’s Tee Time?
  • Any time is tee time.
  • Golf suits me to a tee.
  • If there Is no golf In heaven… I’m not going.
  • Some basic photos from the golf club.
  • Does this perfect swing go with my outfit?
  • The golf of Mexico.
  • Flying on a golf-stream jet.
  • May the course be with you.
  • Asking fore a friend.
  • I am the golf-father.
Golfer with funny golf puns
  • Fore-get me nots.
  • This is all fore the best.
  • Un-fore-gettable, in every way.
  • The Bogey-man.
  • Kiss my putt.
  • No ifs, ands or putts.
  • Putter late than never.
  • Stop leering at my putt.
  • It’s a tee-utiful day.
  • This is my cup of tee.
  • To tee or not to tee.
  • All bets par off.
  • As par as the eye can see.
  • Let’s par-tee.
  • Talk birdie to me.

Short Funny Golf Quotes for Instagram

“The most important shot in golf is the next one.” ― Ben Hogan

“The uglier a man’s legs are, the better he plays golf – it’s almost a law.” ― H. G. Wells

“The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course.” ― Billy Graham

“If you think it’s hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball.” ― Jack Lemmon

“My worst day at golf still beats my best day at work.” – Corn Rows

Golfer with funny quotes for golfing by Rows

“If you watch a game, it’s fun. If you play at it, it’s recreation. If you work at it, it’s golf.” ― Bob Hope

“A great deal of unnecessarily bad golf is played in this world.” ― Harry Vardon

“Golf is like solitaire. When you cheat, you cheat only yourself.” ― Tony Lema

“Golf has probably kept more people sane than psychiatrists have.” ― Harvey Penick

“They call it golf because all the other four letter words were taken.” ― Raymond Flyod

“I know I am getting better at golf because I am hitting fewer spectators.” – Gerald Ford

Golfers with short funny quotes on golf by Ford

“A major golf tournament is 40,000 sadists watching 144 masochists.” ― Thomas Boswell

“I know I am getting better at golf because I am hitting fewer spectators.” ― Gerald Ford

“Ours is a youth culture, and like a golf tournament, we honor only low scores.” ― Bill Cosby

“Relax? How can anybody relax and play golf? You have to grip the club, don’t you?” ― Ben Hogan.

“I’m addicted. I’m addicted to golf.” ― Tiger Woods

“Don’t play too much golf. Two rounds a day are plenty.” ― Harry Vardon

“I regard golf as an expensive way of playing marbles.” ― G. K. Chesterton

“While playing golf today I hit two good balls. I stepped on a rake.” ― Henny Youngman

“There’s a reason why golfers walk forward to their next shot. It’s to move on.” – J.R. Rim

Golfers wtih humorous golf quotes by Rim

“If you break 100, watch your golf. If you break 80, watch your business.” ― Joey Lauren Adams

“I don’t play golf to feel bad, I play bad golf, but I feel good.” ― Henry Beard

“I play golf with friends sometimes, but there are never friendly games.” ― Ben Hogan

“With many twists and holes Life is much like a golf game: Without bats you cannot Play.” ― Ana Claudia Antunes

“A golf course is the epitome of all that is purely transitory in the universe; a space not to dwell in, but to get over as quickly as possible.” ― Jean Giraudoux

Golfer with inspirational funny quotes about golf by Ray

“I’ve seen lifelong friends drift apart over golf just because one could play better, but the other counted better.” ― Stephen Leacock

“Enjoyment of golf, regardless of the level you play at, is primarily based on how closely you play to your level of ability.” ― Steve Bann

“There is no movement in golf that cannot be made more difficult through diligent study and practice.” ― Henry Beard

“Show me a man who is a good loser and I’ll show you a man who is playing golf with his boss.” ― James Murray

Golfer with funny golf quotes by Mantle

“I started watching golf for the first time yesterday. I`m really worried about myself. I was actually enjoying it.” ― Ewan McGregor

“If profanity influenced the flight of the ball, the game of golf would be played far better than it is.” ― Horace G. Hutchinson

“Faith has its share of bunkers, and golf has its share of prayers.” ― Max Lucado

“Golf is a game in which you yell fore, shoot six, and write down five.” ― Paul Harvey

So there you have it! Hopefully, we’ve helped you find the perfect funny golf Instagram caption you were looking for.

Pin it for later!

Golfer and cart
Woman holding up a clear chunk of ice on the beach

About the Author

Laynni Locke

I am Laynni Locke, a Canadian writer, reader and traveller with a passion for sharing life’s moments on social media. Keeping friends and family in the loop of our lives though photos and videos has become an essential activity for most.

And it doesn’t matter if you are travelling, celebrating a special occasion or just appreciating day-to-day life, when you take that perfect photo you are going to need the perfect caption or quote before you share it. Which is why we started Routinely Shares, providing comprehensive lists of quotes and captions to cover every occasion, adventure or loved one.

With extensive experience as a travel writer, social media specialist and grant writer, I have made it my mission to curate the best and easiest to use lists for your next post.

Leave a Reply